


if you wish to be loved, love

by postingpebbles



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Fluff, Love Potion/Spell, M/M, Magic, Mutual Pining, Urban Fantasy, ash and eiji are so in love that they don't realize that they are, shorter loves his friends so much, sing possesses the only available brain cell
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-04
Updated: 2019-03-04
Packaged: 2019-11-09 04:16:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17994674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/postingpebbles/pseuds/postingpebbles
Summary: “Which one?”“The one on the right,” Eiji says, turning back to the stove and clearing the area around it. Ash is smart; Eiji’s sure that Ash knows what he means. But it’s when he hears Ash comment that the potion tastesgoodthat alarm bells sound in Eiji’s head. Headache tonics aren’t supposed to taste good, butlove potions—the other potion sitting in the holder—are.Fuck.--(in which ash drinks a love potion, eiji panics, and shorter and sing are good friends.)





	if you wish to be loved, love

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ADreamingSongbird](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ADreamingSongbird/gifts).



> "I will show you a love potion without drug or herb, or any witch's spell; _if you wish to be loved, love."_  
>  ― Charles Lindberg
> 
> to rimi!!!!! i love and adore you with my whole entire heart and i _cackled_ when i found out that i'd be writing for you for this exchange :3c hope you enjoy <33
> 
> (also big big thanks to [raiza](https://archiveofourown.org/users/duendejunior) for listening to my initial ramblings and [jo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jumpforjo) for reading and re-reading my first few drafts <33 you both are the best!!)

“Eiji?”

“In here, Ash,” Eiji calls, glancing up from the pot to see Ash poke his head through the door. “I am almost finished. You will have to wait a few minutes.”

“Thanks,” Ash sighs, dropping into a chair and tipping his head back. “My head is _killing_ me, and none of the potions that Griff’s trying to force-feed me are doing anything. I told him I’d just go to you, but he’s stubborn as fuck.”

“You probably did not rest enough for them to take effect,” Eiji admonishes, pointing the wooden spoon at him. “It is the first rule of healing potions. You helped me _study_ for the exam so I could open my own shop!”

Ash waves his hand at him, the other one covering his eyes. “Details, details.”

Eiji purses his lips and places the lid on top of the cauldron to let the potion simmer. He lowers the flames, sets a timer, pulls off his gloves, then walks over to where Ash is sitting.

“Hey,” Eiji says softly, poking Ash’s leg. Ash opens one eye, the color shining brilliantly through his fingers, and Eiji sighs. “I _told_ you that you should be sleeping more,” he scolds. “You do too much as it is. My potions are quick fixes, but you know that your migraines will only get worse if you keep ignoring their cause.”

“I didn’t come here to be lectured,” Ash says grumpily, but he hooks his foot around Eiji’s ankle, and a light blush stains his cheeks.

Eiji smiles, seeing the apology easily. The timer dings then, and Eiji gets back up and walks over to the fire. He can feel Ash’s eyes boring into him, but Eiji does his best to ignore it. Two vials—one empty and the other already filled, stoppered, and ready for another customer—rest in the same holder, and Eiji carefully fills the empty vial with the freshly-made potion.

He brings the holder containing the two vials to the counter and sets it down. The glass rattles, and Ash lopes toward them. “Which one?”

“The one on the right,” Eiji says, turning back to the stove and clearing the area around it. Ash is smart; Eiji’s sure that Ash knows what he means. But it’s when he hears Ash comment that the potion tastes _good_ that alarm bells sound in Eiji’s head. Headache tonics aren’t supposed to taste good, but _love potions_ —the other potion sitting in the holder— _are._

_Fuck._

“Ash, stop—!” Eiji yelps, whirling around only to see Ash down the rest of it like a shot. Eiji can only stand there, frozen, and watch as his best friend’s face scrunches up when the potion enters his system.

As Eiji very well knows, there are four immediate effects after consuming a love potion.

  1. The user will develop a deep attraction to the first person they make eye contact with, known as their First Contact. As Eiji is the only one in the room with him, Eiji is most definitely Ash’s.
  2. The user will become more affectionate around their First Contact. The amount and intensity of the affection depends on the First Contact’s stated boundaries.
  3. Depending on the user’s personality, some side effects may include petty jealousy and possessiveness when their First Contact is around other people.
  4. The user will be freed from the potion’s effects after exactly 24 hours. Eiji can only hope that nothing weird goes on within that time frame.



So Eiji stays quiet, studying Ash’s demeanor, and steels himself for a sudden flip in personality. He’s thrown, though, when Ash proceeds to act normally, with absolutely none of the effects that should happen _happening._

“I don’t think I’ll ever get used to how potions work,” Ash says, shuddering, and missing Eiji’s shocked expression. “ _But_ at least my headache’s finally gone. Thanks, Eiji.”

“A-Anytime!” he says, hoping Ash didn’t catch that split-second of hesitation before his answer. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine?” Ash responds, giving Eiji a confused look. “I just told you my headache’s gone and I’m okay.” He glances down at the empty vial. “Should I have saved you some?”

“No!” Eiji nearly shouts.

Ash laughs. “ _Okay_ then, no potion for Mr. Potion Man.”

“Mr. Potion—” Eiji splutters. “I run a respectable business here, Aslan Callenreese! Don’t you dare make light of my shop.” Eiji turns his face away, pouting, and pouts even harder when Ash continues to laugh.

“Aw, Eiji, I’d never,” Ash teases. “Anyway, I’ve gotta go. They still need me back at the library.”

Eiji stills. “Are you leaving now?”

Ash pushes his hair away from his face, but some small strands still fall over his eyes. “Yeah. Some of the older books started throwing fits since they weren’t being used, and _that_ scared the younger ones enough that people can’t even _open_ them for fuck’s sake. The library’s an absolute shitstorm right now.”

“Ah. Good luck.”

Ash shoots him a soft smile—the kind that never fails to make Eiji’s heart flutter. “Thanks. I’ll see you later?”

“Yes. I will be here.”

Ash leans forward to pull Eiji to his chest, warm and solid, and Eiji wraps his arms around Ash’s waist. He breathes in the scent of wind and musty books and protection spells cast about Ash’s being, and Eiji allows his expression to crumble when Ash can no longer see his face.

 

* * *

   

> **Me**  
>  Shorter I may have a problem
> 
> **Shorter**  
>  whats up?  
>  did you finally fess up to ash  
>  or did he say smth to u
> 
> **Me**  
>  nO  
>  I just  
>  May have accidentally given him a love potion…?
> 
> **Shorter**  
>  NICE
> 
> **Me** ****  
> NO NOT NICE IT IS BAD  
>  I CANNOT FORCE HIM TO FALL IN LOVE WITH ME THAT IS THE WORST THING SOMEONE COULD DO  
>  THIS IS A PROBLEM
> 
> **Shorter** **  
> ** right okay sorry eiji calm down i’ll be right over

 

* * *

 

Eiji’s leg is bouncing as he finishes recounting the entire story to Shorter (and Sing, who’d been brought along), and he glances up to see similar gobsmacked expressions on their faces. “And now I don’t know what to do!” he wails.

“So let me get this straight,” Sing says, valiantly ignoring Shorter’s snort at the last word, “you gave Ash a love potion—”

“I did not give it to him on purpose!”

“—and there’s been no change in his personality whatsoever,” he concludes. “Are you sure that it was even a love potion? Eiji, I know you’re good at this stuff, but even _you_ might make mistakes sometimes.”

“…I tested the potion he left behind,” Eiji whispers. “He definitely drank the wrong one.”

“Well, shit,” Shorter offers helpfully.

As Eiji buries his face into his hands, he hears a sharp _smack_ and an answering yelp from Shorter. When he looks up again, Shorter is pouting and rubbing his upper arm while Sing glares.

“What my dear cousin _meant_ to say, Eiji,” Sing says, crossing his arms, “is that we’ll help you. If you don’t want Ash to fall in love with you, we’ll minimize the contact that you have with each other until the potion wears off.”

Eiji’s brain screeches to a halt. “Fall in love…?” he whispers. “Of course I want him to fall in love with me, just—not like this!”

Shorter is the one who fixes him with a look this time. “So you _do_ love him?” he asks, unusually solemn.

Eiji’s cheeks are aflame, but he nods. “For as long as I can remember.”

Shorter grins. “Then isn’t this the perfect opportunity? Those old stories about love potions have _some_ truth in them.” He nudges Sing. “Remember that story you made me read you when you were little?”

Sing screeches, resuming his barrage on Shorter’s arm, but that only makes Shorter’s smile grow.

“What story?” Eiji asks, tilting his head.

“Oh, our Sing here was a real romantic when he was little—or, littl _er_ ” —Sing slaps him again— “but you know all the exceptions to love potions, right?”

Eiji nods. With where he is now, he couldn’t call himself a potions master without knowing the effects of each one and what neutralizes them. “True Love breaks them each time,” Eiji says, and Shorter nods.

“So what if the potion never worked on Ash because he was already in love with someone?” Shorter asks, looking sly, and Eiji’s eyes widen.

“You mean—” he whispers, the realization slotting into place, and the look on Shorter’s face only confirms that.

“Ash is in love with _you._ ”

 

* * *

 

Eiji’s mind is still whirling with the epiphany as he and Sing start making lunch, and Shorter is banished back to the sitting room.

“You really didn’t know?” Sing asks. He chops up tomatoes into slices as Eiji places thick pieces of toast on the buttered pan. Sing’s magic would make it all go faster, but Eiji’s hands are twitching and he needs something to do.

“I love him, and he loves me,” Eiji says. He knows that for a fact. They’re friends and friends love each other—but not all friends want to kiss each other. Repeatedly. And preferably for a long time. He tells Sing this, and Sing huffs.

“I didn’t say anything earlier because I wanted to know how _you_ felt about everything, but… Ash looks at you like he’d do anything for you,” he says, waving the knife to emphasize his point, and Eiji quickly pushes his arm down so that Sing doesn’t accidentally take out either of their eyes. “Sorry,” Sing says flippantly, setting the knife on the countertop, then continues, “but we all always kinda thought you were each other’s? If that makes sense.”

Sing is looking at him, curiosity in his expression, and Eiji pulls his gaze away from Sing’s. He stares down at the frying toast before flipping each slice over and pressing the spatula down. Then he sighs. “I know.”

“Then why didn’t you do anything if you knew?” Sing presses, sounding every inch a child with his question, even at fifteen years old and showing signs of a growth spurt.

Eiji glances back at him. Why didn’t they do anything? Some things just… _don’t,_ and even as he tries to explain that to Sing, he knows that it’s different now. Because now, he has at least some confirmation that his feelings toward his closest friend are more than requited, but even that scares him. The amount of love that Eiji has for Ash is overflowing, and he wouldn’t dare do anything that could threaten their relationship.

“You could just talk to him, you know,” Sing says, holding out a plate for Eiji to put the toast on. “And you said he loves you. The potion _proves_ that. What’s the worst that could happen?”

“I—it is like—” Eiji flounders, trying to search for the right word that could express exactly how much Ash means to him, but he doubts he could even express the sentiment in Japanese. “Ash is my best friend first,” Eiji finally says. “I don’t want to lose him. Or for things to be different.”

“You won’t,” Sing replies. “And things will definitely be the same!”

And Eiji, startled by his surety, blurts out, “How do you know?” Something as big as this—it’s more implausible that something _wouldn’t_ change than will.

“I don’t know Ash as well as you and Shorter do, but I _do_ know that you mean a lot to him,” Sing says, shrugging as he picks up another plate. “He’s… different around you. Less guarded, I think? I just know that he wouldn’t let you go _that_ easily. And you both already act like you’re in love anyway, so there wouldn’t be much change in that sense.”

Sing’s words settle in Eiji’s mind as they walk back towards the sitting room. Ash’s behavior… isn’t that just how he is? A disaster human in the mornings. Motivated and dedicated to anything he sets his mind to. An endless fount of affection for those he loves.

“It is scary to think about,” Eiji says softly.

Sing pats Eiji’s shoulder as they sit across from Shorter, who has clearly overheard the entire conversation in the kitchen. “You’re important to him,” Shorter says, shrugging. “I’ve known him for _years,_ and I’ve never seen him love someone who isn’t Griffin as much as he loves you. Honestly,” he notes, leaning back and crossing his arms, “you’re both idiots for not talking about this sooner.”

Eiji bursts into laughter, relief flooding his entire being. They really were, weren’t they. Eiji knows he’s good about talking through feelings with other people, but not so much when it comes to his own.

“Go see him,” Shorter suggests. “Just talking about it with us isn’t going to do anything.”

“I will,” Eiji agrees, already feeling lighter. “Thank you both.”

 

* * *

 

At Shorter and Sing’s combined encouragement, Eiji takes the train to the library so he can see Ash after he gets off his shift. He jams his hands into his pockets and weaves around tourists in an effort to climb those stone steps. The entrance is smooth without a bag to check in, then he climbs up even _more_ stairs to the Rose Main Reading Room.

It seems calmer now—none of the trouble that Ash had mentioned this morning is even present. Eiji watches fae flit about, taking inventory of the large tomes in their tablets. Libraries, even those in Japan, seem to attract magical beings of all kinds. Ash is the rare exception, being someone who possesses not even a drop of magical blood in him. Even then, he moves with grace, filled with an uncanny knowledge and memory of everything he’s ever experienced.

Eiji closes his fingers around the headache tonic. He brought it just in case Ash _did_ end up needing it, but he doubts he will.

Ash is shelving books by hand when Eiji enters the room. His glasses are perched on his nose, his eyes squinted as he obviously struggles to read the tiny text, and a smile slips across Eiji’s lips. Ash doesn’t seem to have noticed him yet.

“Ash!” Eiji calls, his nerves trying and failing to settle in his stomach.

Ash’s head lifts when he hears him, and he breaks into a smile when they make eye contact. “Eiji! What are you doing here?” He looks gorgeous like this, all soft green gaze and gentle expression, and now that Eiji knows what he’s looking for—there’s barely-concealed love in there too.

“I came to see you,” he says truthfully. “We did not get much time to talk this morning, so if you have time after your shift—”

“I do!” Ash says, just a little too loudly. There’s a light flush staining his cheeks, and Eiji holds back another smile. How could he have been so blind to miss _this?_ “I’m off in five minutes so uh, you can sit here and wait until then.”

Eiji patiently sits down and watches Ash interact with the patrons, reshelve some more books, and then finally clock out. They walk out of the library together, and Eiji bumps Ash’s shoulder as they sit down on one of the stone benches.

“This is for you,” Eiji says lightly, placing the glass vial in Ash’s palm. “It was supposed to be for your headache.”

Eiji knows that the phrasing won’t slip Ash’s notice; he’s much too observant for that. “Supposed to be,” Ash echoes. He looks up from the tonic and into Eiji’s eyes, the information already processing in his mind. “I didn’t drink anything _dangerous,_ did I?”

Eiji shakes his head, his arms waving wildly. “No! Nothing like that, I promise. It was—” Then Eiji takes a deep breath, steeling himself. “It was a love potion,” he finally admits. “I’d brewed it for another customer, but…” Eiji didn’t need to ask if Ash knew what those effects were—of _course_ he did—and he’s sure that Ash has noticed by now that nothing changed in his behavior since ingesting it.

Ash quiets. “Oh. So you know then?” he asks softly. The question could have meant anything. But Eiji isn’t best friends with Aslan Callenreese for nothing.

So he nods, closing his hands around Ash’s own. “Yes. How long have—”

“—I loved you? Um. A while,” Ash mumbles.

“A while?”

Ash clears his throat. “Yeah,” he says, turning his face away, but Eiji can still clearly see the blush staining his cheeks and climbing to the tips of his ears. “This is—I didn’t want—” Then Ash groans, burying his face in his free hand. “Eiji, I… I’m sorry. ”

“For what?”

“For saying it. Pressuring you with this. _Fuck._ ” Eiji can see Ash’s face scrunch up in frustration as his normally-smooth manner of speech begins to sputter. “I’m sorry. I’m not good at this _feelings_ stuff. Not like you.”

“Ash…”

“Just forget it,” Ash says roughly, the words pained, and Eiji knows what he has to do next.

“I will not,” Eiji says, firm. He’s never been surer of anything else. “I will _not_ , because Ash—I love you too!” Ash is facing him now, his lips parted and his expression stunned and vulnerable, and Eiji takes advantage of his silence to wrap him in a hug. “I was afraid that the love potion might have forced you to fall in love with me, and I would have _never_ forgiven myself if that were true.”

“But Eiji, it didn’t, I’m fine—”

“I know that now,” Eiji says, squeezing Ash tighter. “It gave me the courage to tell you, and thank god the potion did not work.”

“Of course it didn’t. Love potions only affect people who aren’t in love, and I’ve only ever fallen in love with _you,_ ” Ash mutters, his lips pressed against Eiji’s hair and his hands splayed on Eiji’s back as he hugs him back.

Joy sparks in his heart.

“Can I kiss you?” Eiji blurts, pulling back, and Ash’s eyes widen. “It is also something that I’ve wanted to do.” Then he adds cheekily, “For a while.”

Ash huffs. “Keep that attitude up and I might just say no.”

“You won’t,” EIji says.

“I won’t,” Ash agrees, his expression tender now.

There’s a second of uncertainty as they stare at each other, Eiji’s gaze flickering from Ash’s green eyes, to his pink cheeks, and then to his soft mouth. Ash is never without a tube of chapstick, so Eiji has no doubt his lips are softer than they look. “What do we do now?” he breathes, moving his hands up to Ash’s shoulders while Ash’s slide down to Eiji’s waist.

“This, I guess,” Ash says, leaning in.

Their first kiss is soft, hesitant—but sweet. Eiji isn’t sure when to breathe, if he should move his hands somewhere else, or if he should even _open his eyes,_ but the gentle pressure of Ash’s lips against his own is strange and new and lovely and utterly _addicting._

Eiji never wants to let go.

 

* * *

 

“We are dating now,” Eiji announces a day later, gripping Ash’s hand in his own. They’re back in Eiji’s shop, but there are no wayward potions to accidentally drink—only good food and good friends to share it with.

Shorter feigns surprise. “Really?” he gasps, putting a hand over his heart. “I never would’ve guessed— _mmph!”_

With a smirk, Sing lowers his hand, and the napkin flutters uselessly to the ground. “We’re glad,” Sing says, grinning. “Took you long enough to realize it.”

Shorter tries to toss a piece of food back at Sing in retaliation, but Sing stops it midair with another lazy wave of his hand. “No fair,” Shorter grumbles as Sing floats it back to his plate.

“You have flame magic,” Sing shoots back. “Not my fault your core decided to be something you can’t use in the house.”

“I can cook with it!” Shorter protests.

“You _can’t_. I _can_ ,” Sing corrects, and Eiji giggles as Shorter and Sing continue to squabble. Sometimes Eiji thinks that the two of them like to argue just for fun—especially Shorter, who’s delighted that his “baby” cousin can match wits with him.

“No throwing food in my home!” Eiji scolds, trying and failing to hold back his laughter. “Who are you expecting to clean this up?”

“Sing will,” Shorter volunteers, grinning at the look of outrage on Sing’s face. “Don’t worry, Eiji, he’ll leave your house cleaner than we arrived.”

“We _both_ will,” Sing insists.

“They took it well,” Ash says as he and Eiji do the dishes later, his voice filled with mirth. Shorter and Sing had offered, looking contrite after they eventually knocked over a glass of water halfway through dinner, but Eiji waved them off. The dishes weren’t anything Eiji (and Ash) couldn’t handle.

“They already _knew,_ ” Eiji says back.

Ash shrugs, accepting Eiji’s hip bump. “All the better then.”

Eiji grins. “Love you,” he says because he _can_ , going up on his tiptoes to press a quick kiss to Ash’s jaw. As expected, Ash’s cheeks turn pink. He’s so _cute._

“Love you too,” Ash says, his little smile saying more than any words ever could.

And Eiji knows it was true.

**Author's Note:**

> please tell me what you thought! and come say hello if you'd like c:
> 
> [tumblr](https://eijis-okuumura.tumblr.com) // [twitter](https://twitter.com/postingpebbles)


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